Death in a Different Light
by Lavender Saiyajin
Summary: Starts out mildly angsty... then moves on to humor. Please review... or else I will kill it!!!
1. 1 Death

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing... And somebody's gonna pay for that!!!  
  
Warnings: Attempted humor, OOC... all that kind of stuff... minor bad language... yadda yadda...  
  
Oh! If anybody wonders, thoughts are in between these "//". This "( )" is me interrupting. A computer's voice will be between these, " ' ' ". A change of POV will be "*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*". Scene changes will be "*". Okay? ****  
  
I'm beginning to see death in a different light.  
  
/What the hell is going on?/  
  
The one and only God of Death is being faced with the real thing. And suddenly I realize just why so few actually want to die. I mean, would you like getting greeted by a skeleton in the morning?  
  
"Uhm... Aren't you supposed to let somebody have another chance at life, or something?"  
  
The skeleton looks at me. I don't know how I know that it's looking at me, I just do. "do you mean the traditional game of chess?"  
  
"I'd prefer poker..." and really, I would. Quatre might be able to beat this guy at chess, but honestly, I barely even know how to play.  
  
"I don't play poker. If you wish, I will play chess with you."  
  
Damn... I never realized that Death would be such a cold hearted bastard! "But I suck at chess," I whine. Finally I sigh. It's my only chance, right? "What are the stakes?" I may sometimes act the baka that Heero had always called me, but I'm not so stupid as to go into anything blind.  
  
"My job vs. your life."  
  
"Now that's weird."  
  
So we sat down and played. And yup, you guessed it. I lost. So he gave me twenty four hours.  
  
/What the hell am I going to do with that?/  
  
Then he left.  
  
Hilde knocked on my door. Said she heard another voice. I told her, straight out and blunt, that I was leaving. What? Did you actually think that I'm cruel enough to tell her that I'm gonna die? And I would be leaving. I had to talk to the others.  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
She did seem a bit irritated. "I'm gonna go talk to the others... And then... I'm leaving."  
  
She growled at me.  
  
I ignored her and picked up the phone. I dialed and listened to it ring for a moment. "Hello?" asked the voice on the other line.  
  
"Quatre?"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Is Trowa there? And how about Wufei?"  
  
"Actually, yes, to both."  
  
"You mind if I come over?"  
  
"No... Why?"  
  
"I... have to talk to you guys about something."  
  
"Oh..." he sounded a bit confused.  
  
"I'll be over in a bit."  
  
*  
  
And so... there I was, an hour later, at Quatre's house with my three remaining comrades staring at me, waiting for me to speak.  
  
I shuffled my feet. They stared. This went on for a good twenty minutes before Wufei broke.  
  
"What the hell is it!!!"  
  
I shuffled my feet. Trowa stared. Quatre shifted on his feet. Wufei waited for an answer.  
  
Somehow, I don't think that I'll be able to say it soon.  
  
Quatre spoke, "I'm sorry, but I think that I agree with Wufei here. What the hell IS it?"  
  
Trowa blinked. I stared at my feet. Wufei stared. Quatre waited for an answer.  
  
"........" Trowa poked me in the shoulder.  
  
Alright. They are all lined up against me. I have to say it now. "Well... I got a visit earlier today."  
  
They waited for me to continue.  
  
"Apparently, I'm gonna die in..." I looked at my watch, "about... Twenty two hours and... twenty minutes."  
  
They stared. Wufei spoke, "What the fuck?"  
  
I nodded, after all, that's fairly close to what I'd been thinking all day. "You know that whole thing about playing chess with Death?"  
  
They nodded.  
  
"I did."  
  
Quatre blinked, "But you hardly know how to play!"  
  
"I know. I lost. Actually, I was thinking the entire time that you would have been able to beat him. He wasn't THAT good... just better than me. Now if it had been poker..."  
  
"You would have everything that he ever owned," finished Wufei.  
  
I nodded. "But he refused to play poker."  
  
"What would you have gotten if you had won?" Quatre asked.  
  
"He was saying something about retiring if I won. Kinda weird."  
  
".........." Trowa blinked.  
  
"Yup, and I would have gotten his job. Not that I really wanted it... I had enough of playing Shinigami during the war."  
  
So we sat around bullshitting for a few hours. When bedtime came around, I didn't really feel like sleeping... Can you blame me? Surprisingly enough, it was Wufei who stayed up with me. It was kind of quiet.  
  
It was strange, though. I nearly felt like crying. Wufei... hugged me. I never actually got cuddled just for the sake of cuddling. So I almost did start crying. I think... that I may have let one tear slip...  
  
Surprisingly enough... or maybe not so surprisingly, I did fall asleep.  
  
*  
  
When the time came... I wasn't falling all over myself, whimpering and crying... Although I did wonder out loud if it was gonna hurt. Actually, that was probably the biggest of my worries. Odd, really.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
And so it happened. One moment he was talking, the next his eyes had widened and... it looked like he had passed out. But we knew what had happened. I felt his neck for a pulse... and there was none. Then... something creepy happened. His body disappeared.  
  
I looked at Quatre and Trowa. They looked shocked. "You know," I said, "I was hoping that it was just a really odd dream of his."  
  
They both nodded. Quatre sniffed. Trowa patted him on the head.  
  
"What does it mean if the body disappears?" Quatre asked.  
  
"It means that he gets to keep it. Those who... do great things... good or bad, often get to keep their bodies. Remember how we couldn't find anything of Heero when he self-destructed?"  
  
"So he kept his body too?" Trowa asked. Hn. How odd. Trowa spoke.  
  
"I think so. I could be wrong..."  
  
/Eh... see you in the afterlife, Maxwell.../  
  
****Yes, Duo did die. I'm gonna split the fic in between his and Wufei's POVs. Don't worry, he will be back... Sorta. Anyway, if you like it or want me to continue, please review. This will be mildly angst. But towards the end, it'll be more of a humor thing.  
  
Anyway, I think that my muse is mad at me...  
  
*Ferocious feline starts chasing author*  
  
Maz! I swear! I know that you like Duo... don't worry... I'll let you meet him!!! Maz!!! 


	2. 2 Feel

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing... So stop looking at me!!!  
  
Thank you:  
  
Relwarc... Here you go. A new chapter!  
  
wufeilover... Don't worry about Duo. The fic is still about him... and WuFei. Not together though, at least (if it happens at all) not yet.  
  
Mystik-chan... ^-^ Thankies!!  
  
Warnings: Attempted humor, OOC... all that kind of stuff... minor bad language... yadda yadda...  
  
Oh! If anybody wonders, thoughts are in between these "//". This "( )" is me interrupting. A computer's voice will be between these, " ' ' ". A change of POV will be "*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*". Scene changes will be "*". Okay? ****  
  
I really couldn't help but stare. After all, I had expected to see the skeleton... not some girl in pink with blue hair, sitting on an oar.  
  
"What?" she asked, "Do I have something on my face?"  
  
I shook my head. "I was expecting someone else."  
  
"Oh... You think that I'm too pretty to be the Grim Reaper... I see..."  
  
"Actually, I was expecting to see the skeleton."  
  
"Oooh! So you actually saw him before... that would explain your reaction perfectly... although I was wondering why you were rescheduled..." She pulled out a book and started flipping through it.  
  
"Would 'chess' explain it?"  
  
"Yes it would, actually."  
  
"Do you have a name?"  
  
"Oh! I'm sorry. Yes, I do. It's Botan. And I will be your guide today, Duo Maxwell."  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
We stared back and forth amongst ourselves. None of us could think of anything to say, really. Quatre had always been quiet and shy. Trowa had always been just plain quiet. And I really had no clue what to say.  
  
"........."  
  
Quatre and I stare. Looks like it'll be Trowa to break the silence.  
  
"I... think..."  
  
I lift an eyebrow.  
  
"........."  
  
Quatre and I blink and glance at each other. Trowa didn't speak often, and when he did, he always completed his sentence. So we waited, expecting him to pick up where he left off at any time.  
  
After about ten minutes, it was obvious that he wasn't going to finish his sentence. Quatre sniffed. Startled at the sudden noise, Trowa and I looked at him.  
  
"......!" Trowa, panicking, silently begged me for help.  
  
You wouldn't believe just how disturbing that really is.  
  
Quatre sniffed again. He was about to start crying. Trowa stared at me. I stared back. I'm not that good at comforting people.  
  
Oh, no... there go the tears. I sweatdrop. Trowa looked very upset. Quatre turned around and buried his face in Trowa's shirt.  
  
I lift an eyebrow. Something just HAS to be going on between those two. Actually, it's almost funny, watching Trowa blush like that. It would be funny... if it weren't for the situation.  
  
I almost envy Maxwell, though. The afterlife must be a lot more interesting than what's left of this life.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
They say that fact is stranger than fiction. Who would have thought?  
  
Here I am, the one-time, self-proclaimed Shinigami, riding on an oar and heading to... Never mind, I don't know where I'm heading.  
  
I stare at the blue hair in front of me. It kept snapping back and hitting me in the face. I almost want to yell at her. Almost. And why does that snapping hair actually hurt?  
  
"Hey!"  
  
"Huh?" Now that I have her attention...  
  
"If I'm dead, then how is it that your hair is hurting my face?"  
  
She blinked. The oar stopped. I fell off. Luckily, being dead, /Or is it "ethereal"? /, I didn't fall. "You feel that?"  
  
"Yes, it's downright annoying."  
  
Still sitting on her little oar, she pulled out that book that she'd been going through earlier. "Oh!" she exclaimed. "You are so lucky! You get to keep your body!"  
  
I blink. "Then why am I... Eeeeep!!!" I grab blindly at the oar as I start to fall.  
  
"You know," said Botan, "if you don't think about it, you won't fall."  
  
"What do you mean, 'don't think about it'? How can I help but think about it? I may be dead, but I'm still only human!"  
  
"You are?" she sounded startled. She started poking through her little book again. "No you're not... but you don't know that. Kind of like Yuusuke. Only his wasn't on file." She shrugged.  
  
/Not human? But I thought that... Damnit! I have to ask! / "What do you mean, 'not human'?"  
  
"Well, it says here that you DID claim to be a Shinigami, and to pull that off... well you couldn't be entirely human."  
  
/Insert here, "Jaw hits the floor". / Yup. I was floored. Hot damn...  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
We ended up attaching his memorial to Heero's. Quatre has been having a hard time this past couple of weeks since Duo died. I think that of all of us, he was the nicest.  
  
**** Is WuFei angsting over Duo? And just what was Trowa trying to say? Next chapter will have ACTION. Kind of.  
  
Maz- What do you mean, "kind of"?  
  
*shrug* I don't know... I don't remember... 


	3. 3 Customs

Hey hey! I'm back already!  
  
Thank yous:  
  
Kelp Soda... Heero shall appear after a while. At this point, he's dead, so... Duo has to go through customs before he can see Heero.  
  
Disclaimer: Don't look at me... I don't own them. *Hides an armload of paperwork behind back*  
  
Warnings: Attempted humor, OOC... all that kind of stuff... minor bad language... yadda yadda...  
  
Oh! If anybody wonders, thoughts are in between these "//". This "( )" is me interrupting. A computer's voice will be between these, " ' ' ". A change of POV will be "*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*". Scene changes will be "*". Okay? ****  
  
She says I'm not human. She says to claim to be Shinigami and live while saying so proves it.  
  
I would also like to say here that I had believed, up to this point, that my own bedroom was the epitome of chaos.  
  
I was wrong.  
  
As I clung to the oar before me, I stared at what must have been the "Customs" for the afterlife. Let me tell you, I've seen enough chaos that I'm fairly certain that the guy running this must be going through... well... Hell. Pardon my pun.  
  
"Eh... Botan?"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"What the hell did the guy running this do to deserve this job?"  
  
"Well... He's Enma-Daioh's son."  
  
"Oh... poor kid... How old is he?"  
  
"He's about... five hundred and twenty-five."  
  
"......" I just called somebody who's more than five centuries older than me a kid. Oops. "Does he get any compensation for that?"  
  
Botan laughed. "Not likely."  
  
"Man... Poor k-er-guy..."  
  
"Well," she said, dropping me on the floor, "My job ends at this point. Now, I'm off to keep Yuusuke out of trouble. Perhaps I'll see you around."  
  
"Uhmmm..." Okay, what do I do now?  
  
"Excuse me," says a big burly voice as I'm knocked back to the floor. "Do you know where I can find the restrooms?"  
  
I looked up. I had to look up. There was a HUGE portly demon looking at me. He(?) was tall, he was broad, and all I could hope for at that moment was that he wouldn't step on me. "Uhmmm.."  
  
"Well?"  
  
"No."  
  
"No?"  
  
"That's right. No."  
  
He leaned over me and I scooted back out of panic. "Oh," he said, "I thought you were one of the employees... Customs is over there." He pointed at a giant sign that said "Customs", with a little arrow pointing at a guy in a desk.  
  
There was a very -let me stress the "very"- long line in front of the desk. There were all sorts of creatures standing in the line. I walked to the end of the line preparing myself to be bored.  
  
Not that I was bored... No, in fact, quite the contrary. But this was getting a little... I don't know... old, maybe?  
  
I sighed, resigning myself to a long wait.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Three years. Quatre has somewhat accepted that Duo is gone. Trowa works day and night to keep his boyfriend happy. /It became really apparent after Duo's death./  
  
Yet... Recently, we have been receiving threats on Quatre's life. Trowa is on the verge of having a nervous breakdown...  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
I stare off in the direction Trowa went. I told him to go and rest. I don't want to have to put him in the hospital...  
  
There is a creaking sound from the direction of the other door. "WuFei?"  
  
A soft laugh answered me. It wasn't WuFei. I looked at the door. The laugh was familiar. I walked over too it and stared into the room beyond. It... couldn't be! "Duo?"  
  
A soft laugh from the dark figure answered him. "Looks like I got the job anyway... Good thing I got into the habit of visiting a day in advance."  
  
"I'm... Tomorrow?"  
  
"Not you..."  
  
"Who?"  
  
No answer.  
  
"Tell me Duo!"  
  
"... Well... The chess thing is a little outdated, you know..." Duo didn't even look at me.  
  
"Who?!"  
  
"It's poker now... You do know that I always win at poker, right?"  
  
"Who, damnit!?!"  
  
"Since he's asleep now... I can't exactly play poker with him..." Duo shook his head. "Not that he would win."  
  
"Trowa? Oh, my God, Trowa!!" No... Not Trowa. I don't want Trowa to die!  
  
"On a lighter note..." Duo smiled, "Heero actually says that he misses you guys."  
  
"Wha...?" I glanced up at him weakly.  
  
"And you actually, have the least to worry about. We weren't destined to live long." Duo sighed, "Heero least of all actually, considering that he was so suicidal."  
  
"What?" I was still regaining my thought processes from the shock I'd just gotten.  
  
"WuFei will probably last longest though..."  
  
"How's that?" I ask hoarsely.  
  
"He's stubborn."  
  
"Trowa..."  
  
"Go give him a kiss... or something... You know, I've been so bored lately that I've been reduced to reading corny romance novels?"  
  
"What?" That is... just plain weird. "I always knew you were strange..."  
  
"They never go beyond kissing in those books though... Give him something to remember you by! A bit more than kissing! Make sure he doesn't die a virgin!"  
  
"Duo...! He's not!"  
  
"Oh... So you guys made good progress after I left."  
  
"Duo!!"  
  
"Besides, it'll give you something too... I don't care if you tell him. Just... Don't traumatize him, okay?"  
  
**** Sorry. That was... odd. More of interest next chapter.  
  
I was laughing my ass off though a good part of this though... 


	4. 4 Annoyance?

Sorry, I tried to fill out the paperwork for it,  
  
Thank yous:  
  
Relwarc... Sorry, but Trowa had to go first, because I'm going by number *v.v'*. Don't worry too much about Quatre... and WuFei... He'll live a fair amount longer than the others... but hella not to 90! He's not the type to live that long...  
  
wufeilover... Oh, he'll stay that way... I think... He's got a job to do now...  
  
Disclaimer: I tried filling out the paperwork for it, but it turned out to be a job application for taking over George's job. (George is Koenma- sama's secretary.)  
  
Warnings: Attempted humor, OOC... all that kind of stuff... minor bad language... yadda yadda...  
  
Oh! If anybody wonders, thoughts are in between these "//". This "( )" is me interrupting. A computer's voice will be between these, " ' ' ". A change of POV will be "*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*". Scene changes will be "*". Okay? ****  
  
I had told Quatre, before I left, that I would send letters. After some convincing, /Not that it took much, considering that I'm her boss now,/ Botan agreed to carry mail for me, on occasion. She even said that she'd put it directly in his mailbox, if I wanted her too. /You know? I think she likes me./  
  
Imagine my surprise, though, when she told me what my next job was. You see, Death only personally goes after those who either 1. Refuse to die, or 2. Are going to be important in the Afterlife. I was going after Relena. That is the scariest creature that I know of... and I'm supposed to bring her to the Makkai? That hella sucks... So... I went after her.  
  
Imagine her surprise when she got assassinated. She actually believed that everyone loved her. There were about six things that annoyed me about this particular job though, 1. I had to deal with Relena, 2. I was informed late, 3. I have to deal with Relena, 4. Heero's gonna kill me, 5. I have to deal with Relena, and 6. Heero's really gonna kill me. Oh, and did I mention that I have to deal with Relena?  
  
When she saw me, she shrieked... Sad to say, I had to hear it... everyone else was lucky, they didn't have to deal with the screeching of a dead girl. Funny thing though... she actually survived to the age of twenty. And she had kids. Two. And I sincerely hope that they don't take after her.  
  
Of course, as I tried to drag her to the Makkai, she babbled about Heero. She also said that she had been surprised when she found out that I was dead. /Somehow she had found Heero's memorial, and saw mine next to it./ She actually said that she had been sad to find out. Something about me livening up the parties, which had been getting really boring lately. I wasn't sure whether I should feel flattered or not.  
  
"What have you and Heero been doing with yourselves, you know, since you died?"  
  
"Well... Heero's War... I'm Death... and Treize is..." I snickered, "Beauty."  
  
"Trieze? Beauty? I can understand that, I suppose. Heero War and you Death... those are also fairly understandable..." she actually seems to show a little insight.  
  
"Yeah? You might be surprised with Heero, though." Maybe I was wrong about her...  
  
"How's that?"  
  
"His position on war... He beat the crap out of the previous War... and in doing so took over for him..."  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"He works to prevent them, now. He doesn't want more kids like us to be caught up."  
  
"........."  
  
"He's advocating Peace. And he's doing it well."  
  
"Anything he does, he does well. Surely you noticed that."  
  
"Do you know what's going to happen to me?"  
  
"I don't know." I pulled her towards the "customs". "You'll end up doing something important though. That's all I know. Oh, and I gotta warn you... The big ones tend to trample smaller people... and there's the 'customs'..." I point at the large sign that I had seen the first time here. "Get settled in for a long wait..."  
  
"You won't stay with me?"  
  
"...................."  
  
"Please? This place is......."  
  
"Disturbing? Chaotic? Sorry, but I can't stay, you know..."  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"I have an appointment."  
  
"?"  
  
"Trowa's going to be in line not far behind you."  
  
"What?"  
  
"If you want, you can wait here, and I'll be back with Trowa, and we can all stand in line together. How does that sound?"  
  
"Okay... How long?"  
  
"Couple of hours, maybe." I dug in my pockets. After finally finding what I was looking for, I handed it to her.  
  
"What's this?"  
  
"A book. At least you'll have something to do."  
  
She stared at the cover and then looked back up at me. "A romance?"  
  
I shrugged. "I've been -really- bored lately."  
  
"I prefer thrillers... but I don't expect you to have one. Those pockets can't be big enough to hold two books this size."  
  
I shrugged again. "You'd be surprised... but you're right. I don't tend to carry more than one book at a time..." My watch beeped at me. "Ah, freaking hell! I'm gonna be late!!" I dashed off, not bothering to say "bye"... After all, I'd be back in a couple of hours...  
  
*  
  
On the scene with /glance at watch/ two minutes to spare! Now... all I have to do... is attract Trowa's attention to the assassin. Or else Quatre would die... and it isn't his time yet. Not for another few days.  
  
Okay... Now...  
  
I nudge Trowa's attention to the balconies. Why do assassins always hide in balconies?  
  
He gasped softly and ran to Quatre. And... Gun shot, now.  
  
His eyes blanked as the bullet tore through him. "Sono molto spiacente, Quatre... Spiacente...(1)" And he dropped.  
  
I winced as Quatre started crying. And his body, to the living eye, disappeared. Trowa blinked at his surroundings.  
  
"Shouldn't I be dead?"  
  
"You are dead. Can't you hear Quatre crying?" That's me. Yup, Mr. Tact.  
  
"....................."  
  
"Quatre," I called. "Quatre!"  
  
Quatre sniffled and blinked. "Huh?"  
  
"He's okay. Oh... and WuFei grabbed the assassin." Sure enough, up on the balcony, WuFei was beating the living sh*t out of the assassin. "Well, Trowa, off to Never-Never Land we go. Oh... and Relena's gonna be waiting for us when we get there.  
  
"........................"  
  
"Yeah... There's been a sudden rise in assassinations lately. Hmmm... I wonder what you'll be doing....?"  
  
**** Weird stuff. I know. Maz is mad at me again... I guess she likes Trowa too.  
  
Oh yeah... The (1) up above... That was "I'm very sorry, Quatre... Sorry..." Pretty simple, ne?  
  
This is the kind of stuff I come up with when I've been listening, non- stop, to Metallica for *looks at clock*... over five hours. Am I forgetting anything?  
  
Next chapter... (When I get around to it...) A special cameo appearance by... me! Relena gets propositioned. So does Trowa. By the same guy. Botan delivers several letters... Duo gets very bored. *shudders convulsively* 


	5. 5 Calm

Thank yous:  
  
Starcat... Yeah, wait 'til you see Trowa's big part in this one...  
  
Disclaimer: I still don't own it. *sighs, removing black ninja-gear*  
  
Warnings: Attempted humor, OOC... all that kind of stuff... minor bad language... yadda yadda...  
  
Oh! If anybody wonders, thoughts are in between these "//". This "( )" is me interrupting. A computer's voice will be between these, " ' ' ". A change of POV will be "*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*". Scene changes will be "*". Okay? ****  
  
So we were back in line. Trowa was mostly silent, and Relena made comments about the novel I had handed her. She said that it hadn't been that bad...  
  
When we got to the front of the line, George wasn't there. His replacement shoved up her glasses and told us that he got promoted. So did she. Now she had to deal with the souls of the disbelieving dead.  
  
"So..." asked Relena, "What's your name?"  
  
"Lavender." Typical. She pushed back her hair, which was the same color as her name, and glanced at the paper in front of her. "Relena Peacecraft?"  
  
"Yes, ma'am."  
  
"Hmm... You have a meeting right away... Triton Bloom?"  
  
-Silence-.  
  
"Triton Bloom?" And then, louder, "-Is there a Triton Bloom in this line?-"  
  
And still silence.  
  
She glanced back at the paper. "Oh..." she sounded mildly embarrassed. "Trowa Barton, then?"  
  
"..............................."  
  
"That would be the silent one, here, miss." I stated calmly.  
  
Trowa nodded silently.  
  
"Aaaaah... You also have an appointment... You will be going with Relena Peacecraft, Triton Bloom."  
  
"Il mio nome?(1)" I have no clue what he said, but his voice sounded wondering. "Triton Bloom...?" He cleared his throat. "Uhm, Signora Lavender?"  
  
"Nani?"  
  
"Would Triton Bloom be of any relation to Catherine Bloom?"  
  
The woman sighed, sounding very tired, "I'll look it up..."  
  
-Five minutes later-  
  
".........................."  
  
"Saa, I found it."  
  
"È?(2)"  
  
"Hai."  
  
"Come?(3)"  
  
"She is your Oneesan."  
  
"........................."  
  
"Wow, Trowa," I said, with a grin, "You have family. Ain'tcha glad?"  
  
"Sì, sono felice.(4)" He sure didn't sound glad... He sounded a little more depressed than usual, actually.  
  
"I have no clue what you just said, but you don't sound very happy, Tro- man."  
  
"Ah, but I am," he said, in that same sad tone.  
  
Relena, who we had all forgotten, spoke up, "Aren't we holding up the line?"  
  
"Huh? Eh... Oops..." Oooo.... I really wonder who said that! Not.  
  
So... I ushered them on to their meeting -with Koenma-sama himself- and wandered off. Alone. With nothing to do. And since Heero was busy, I couldn't go bug him... Damn. /Is it bad to say "damn" if you're a god?/  
  
*  
  
So, the next thing I knew, I had run over Botan. Literally. I practically trampled her.  
  
"Duo-sama, you shouldn't be running in the halls!"  
  
Oops, my bad. I -had- been running. Actually, I had been running back and forth, trying to get rid of my "bored" energy.  
  
"What's wrong with you?"  
  
"I'm bored." And the halls became deserted. Even gods fear that phrase coming from my mouth.  
  
"Write a letter. I did promise that I'd deliver them for you."  
  
So, I wrote a letter. Actually, I wrote a half dozen of them. Two to Quatre, two to WuFei, one to Zechs /Even though I barely know the man.../ and one to Hilde. I still don't know whether or not she knows I'm dead.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
............................ (Oooo I wonder who's POV this is?)  
  
This little figure... is the son of the most feared being in existence... Strange.  
  
He was saying some thing... along the lines of having us apprenticed to some god or another. I wasn't surprised. After all, Duo had said something along the lines of us doing something important in the afterlife.  
  
"Miss Relena, you would be best suited to be apprenticed to Peace."  
  
"You really think so, Koenma-sama?"  
  
"Yes, I do, and you..." He turned to me. "You are so out of it..." he paused for a moment. A long moment. No bother. I have plenty of time. It's not like I had anything important to do. And the quiet gives me time to think.  
  
"Tranquility?" Relena suggested. She's so impatient.  
  
"Actually," he says, looking me over, "that seems fitting, in a way."  
  
Calma?(5) I'm flattered that they think so. I would think that I'm too on- the-go for that... I lift an eyebrow.  
  
"Very fitting. You'll probably be disappointed with the present Tranquility though, young man." He sighed, "He's gotten a little... weird, lately." He lifted a phone from his desk. "Lav, hun? Could you send Peace and Tranquility here?"  
  
-After about an hour, give or take ten minutes, because Trowa didn't bother to pay attention to the time...-  
  
Peace showed up. I was shocked, but of course I didn't show it. She looked exactly like Relena, give or take a few gray hairs.  
  
-About two hours later, give or take twenty minutes-  
  
Tranquility showed up. He looked like a sleeze. Not a normal word for me, but... I would bet that this guy makes Duo cringe. And he walked directly up to Relena as Koenma-sama flinched.  
  
"Hello young lady, how would you like to be treated to a good time?" Was that a proposition? I think that it was.  
  
Koenma-sama coughed. "Eherm... Now that you're all here... Have a seat."  
  
Peace had already sat down /Such impatient people.../, so Tranquility was the only one standing.  
  
"Peace? I'd like to introduce you to Relena Peacecraft. She will be your new apprentice."  
  
"New one? What happened to the old one?" Relena asked.  
  
Peace answered, "He beat up War. So I decided that he wouldn't be suited to become Peace. He's War now."  
  
Is she talking about Heero? That is very peculiar.  
  
"Ahem. Tranquility, this young man here will be your apprentice."  
  
The man (Tranquility) turned toward me with a gleam in his eyes that I definitely did -not- like.  
  
"Since the young lady will be busy elsewhere..." I didn't wait for him to finish. I really didn't want to know what he was going to say, even though I already knew... He looked down, in shock, at the -very- dirty sock in his mouth. He spat it out. And looked at it. "Hey...! This is mine!" The lecherous gleam had left his eyes for now.  
  
Koenma-sama stared at me. "How did you do that? I didn't even see you move!"  
  
I blinked slowly at him. I hadn't moved that fast... I shrugged. Why bother trying to answer a question that you don't know the answer to?  
  
**** Okay... no more deaths in this chapter...  
  
(1)"My name?"  
  
(2)"Is she?"  
  
(3)"How?"  
  
(4)"Yes, I am happy."  
  
(5)Calm? (I'm using that for "Tranquility" in Italian *shrugs*)  
  
Next chapter: Cameo appearance by... A guy named Tatsumi (If you don't recognize him, it's okay.). Quatre joins the others and is apprenticed by... And we find out who killed Relena *cheers on mysterious murderer*! 


	6. 6 Love?

Thank yous:  
  
Relwarc... As for how Quatre dies... don't worry, it's not painful. Food poisoning IS painful. I've known survivors of it. WuFei? Yoda? C'mon, I think he's cute, now I'm gonna have nightmares! I already have enough of those about being various bishonen... and I'm not a guy! (Last one I was Heero... for some odd reason, I was going to shoot Duo... for being annoying. Funny thing about that is that, personality-wise, I'm more like Duo.) The time before that, I was Subaru from Tokyo Babylon. Who was it who said that dreams are visions from a past life?  
  
Disclaimer: I may have been part of it in a past life, but I don't own it.  
  
Warnings: Attempted humor, OOC... all that kind of stuff... minor bad language... yadda yadda...  
  
Oh! If anybody wonders, thoughts are in between these "//". This "( )" is me interrupting. A computer's voice will be between these, " ' ' ". A change of POV will be "*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*". Scene changes will be "*". Okay? ****  
  
(Lavender's POV)  
  
Koenma-sama's yelling again. "What do you mean, we don't have the funds?"  
  
If he had asked me, I would have told him that it was definitely because he let Botan use his credit card.  
  
Tatsumi, the treasurer, sighed. "It was all traced back to your card, Koenma-sama. I heard that you had let someone use it?"  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
(WuFei POV)  
  
This is getting a little old. Only a few days ago, Trowa got shot. This morning, I found Quatre, at his desk, apparently drinking tea. I'm gonna kill the butler. The Maguanaucs are all dead now too... It seems that they all thought that it was their fault.  
  
On a lighter note... or perhaps not... Dorothy Catalonia is being put to death (by lethal injection) at noon, for the assassination of Vice-Foreign Minister Relena Dorlian. I'm not sure what to think of that.  
  
I took me a while, though, to realize that I wasn't the last pilot alive. "Preventer Wind", Zechs, is still alive.  
  
And on an odd note... I got a letter from Duo. Talk about weird...  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
(Duo POV)  
  
Strange things... Quatre punched me. When I got him, he started yelling about Trowa, and he punched me. I think I have a black eye.  
  
I've been having a very busy day today. In fact, I've been so busy that I actually managed to con Heero into helping me gather up all of the Maguanaucs... That took a while. And they all ended up in line, right behind Quatre, to whom they cried and asked forgiveness. Heero was rather disgusted with the display.  
  
So I asked him to help me pick up Miss Catalonia. If anything is scarier than the thought of spending a day cooped up with Relena, dragging Dorothy Catalonia to the Makkai is it.  
  
But the look on Heero's face, when she bit him, was priceless. She's awesome, in a way...  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
(Quatre POV)  
  
How humiliating. They all thought that they were at fault? I was the one who wasn't paying any attention when I started drinking the tea left on my desk for me this morning.  
  
"Quatre Raberba Winner?"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Rashid? Abdul?" The lavender-haired woman at the desk started listing all of the Maguanaucs. They each answered as their names were spoken. And then, "Dorothy Catalonia?"  
  
My blood went cold. There was silence.  
  
"Dorothy Catalonia?" she asked, louder. Finally she stood, "Is there a Dorothy Catalonia in this line?" she yelled.  
  
A loud unmistakable voice answered her, "Gomen, ma'am! We're a little late."  
  
"No kidding your late, baka! Where is Dorothy Catalonia?"  
  
"Uhm..." the even-more-than-usual disheveled Duo said eloquently. "Heero's at the back of the line strangling her."  
  
I blinked, "He's what?"  
  
"She bit him."  
  
I couldn't help it. Honestly, I couldn't. A peal of laughter escaped my lips.  
  
"Quatre?" asked the newly released blonde wonder.  
  
Uh-oh. Unfortunately, I was unable to get out of the way before she -glomped- me. "Let me guess," I asked, "Lethal injections?"  
  
"Yeah." Is that...? My face reddened. Dorothy had me pinned to the floor and was... attempting to grope me.  
  
"Duo! Heero! Trowa, if you can hear me! Somebody get her off of me!!!"  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
(Trowa POV)  
  
"Duo! Heero! Trowa, if you can hear me! Somebody get her off of me!!!"  
  
A loud voice /Quatre?/ interrupted my patient dealing with Tranquility. I was sick of the sleeze's lecherous stare, so I decided to see what was going on. Not so surprisingly, I was interrupted. By my "teacher".  
  
"What are you doing?"  
  
"I am curious as to what is going on out there. The yell sounded familiar."  
  
"How familiar?"  
  
"Like one of my friends." I calmly pushed the old lech out of my way as I stepped out the door.  
  
I was right. It was Quatre. And Dorothy. And all of the Maguanaucs, trying to peel her off of him.  
  
I politely asked that they move aside, as I walked to Quatre's side. I deftly grabbed Dorothy by the back of the neck, and she became utterly limp. "Hello, Quatre."  
  
He looked up at me and fainted.  
  
*  
  
Oooo yay. I got to go to another meeting. Relena isn't here this time though. Quatre sat next to me, sending nervous glances at Dorothy, who was seated across the room from us. The Maguanaucs all stood behind us, formally.  
  
Koenma-sama coughed. "Let's see... Miss Dorothy Catalonia? How would you like to be apprenticed to... Mischeif?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"You know, Robin Goodfellow?"  
  
"Sounds nice," she said absently, staring at Quatre. I glared at her. Not that anyone could tell, considering that it was almost the same as my usual expression, but it's the thought that counts, right?  
  
"Hmm... Quatre. I honestly can't think of anything..." he shuffled through the papers on his desk and froze... The pacifier fell from his mouth as his eyes nearly bugged out. Once he had collected himself, he grinned evilly. There was absolutely no other way to describe the look(1).  
  
Quatre shifted in his seat nervously. "What?"  
  
"What's your position on Love?" He wouldn't... would he?  
  
"Uhmm... What do you mean?"  
  
"You will be apprenticed to Love. According to your records, this would be very well suited for you." Apparently, he would.  
  
The Maguanaucs stood proud. Abdul whipped out a handkerchief and wiped at his eyes, "I'm so proud!"  
  
"And you guys..."  
  
Rashid spoke for the others, "We will not leave Master Quatre."  
  
Koenma-sama sweatdropped. "Of course not... This is a very active job, once he takes it over. Quatre will need a lot of help."  
  
**** (1)This is for those of you who watch Yu-Gi-Oh!. In the "battle" between Yuugi and Joey and the ParaDox Twins, Joey gets -this- look on his face when he pulls out a "duplicate magic" kind of card.  
  
Can't think of anything to say here...  
  
Next time: Guest appearance by Watari (He's from the same anime as Tatsumi, who, along with Watari, will appear randomly.). Duo finds a way to lighten his job load. Botan finds a few suspicious things. WuFei gets a visit. And a few years pass. 


	7. 7 Science

Thank yous:  
  
Relwarc... It was just imagining a cross between Yoda and Wu-man that scares me... And about Quatre... You remember how WuFei was saying that he was going to kill the butler? That's 'cause Quatre got poisoned. Like a true aristocrat. Treize is Beauty. He'll be working with Quatre later... I haven't figured out how to kill off Wu-man and Zechsy-boy yet.  
  
Disclaimer: All I managed to do was borrow them. And that's only because I was channeling my past life as Heero, and pulled an "Omae o korosu" on them.  
  
Warnings: Attempted humor, OOC... all that kind of stuff... minor bad language... Yare yare...  
  
Oh! If anybody wonders, thoughts are in between these "//". This "( )" is me interrupting. A computer's voice will be between these, " ' ' ". A change of POV will be "*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*". Scene changes will be "*". Okay? ****  
  
(Duo POV)  
  
"Are you sure this will work?"  
  
"Absolutely."  
  
"And I won't have to be at work constantly?"  
  
"Of course."  
  
"I'll have more free time in which to try and seduce Heero?"  
  
"And do other naughty things, of course," the man in front of me smiled. I can't believe that he had such a low paying job as being a Shinigami. The entire department should get a raise, especially since this man is so willing to help me... Which reminds me...  
  
"Will it hurt?"  
  
"Just a brief sting."  
  
"..........................."  
  
"I need your DNA for it, Duo-sama."  
  
"But Watari~! I don't like needles!!!"  
  
"You do want time off, don't you?"  
  
"Yes, but..."  
  
"Just close your eyes, and it'll be over in a snap."  
  
I closed my eyes and held out my arm. My arm stung briefly, as promised, and then my arm was free again.  
  
"Snap. It's over now."  
  
I glanced at the red mark on my arm. Oh well... It's not like anybody's gonna notice.  
  
"You know, I've always wanted to do this."  
  
"Are you -sure- that this is going to work?"  
  
"Absolutely. It may take a few tries, but I know that I can do it." Such a brilliant scientist. Not at all like the Doctors. And besides that, he's cute, too. The only thing wrong with him is that he's blonde. I don't generally get along very well with blondes.  
  
A new voice breaks into my reverie. "Watari-san, what are you doing?"  
  
Watari jumped. "Mou!!! Tatsumi-san!!! Would you like to help me test my latest..."  
  
"Iie~" Tatsumi growled. "Aren't you supposed to be working?"  
  
"I am working!" Watari wailed. "Duo-sama gave me a job to du~oh..." he laughed weakly at his own joke.  
  
I grinned. "Now, I'm going to have to say that sometime... 'I must have something to du~oh!'" I sang.  
  
Watari's weak laugh became steady.  
  
Tatsumi's eyebrow twitched. "I didn't realize you were in here, Duo-sama. But please keep the projects down to a minimum, Watari-san. Our budget is running low this month."  
  
I grinned. "You know... I was thinking that you guys should get a raise in your budget..."  
  
Tatsumi looked at me hopefully.  
  
"If Watari's project turns out well, I'll attempt to get Koenma-sama to raise it."  
  
His eyes sparkled. It was kind of creepy. "Really? Would you?"  
  
"I said that I'd try... If Watari-kun's project turns out well."  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
(Botan POV)  
  
I've noticed some really odd things this past month. Duo-sama seems to be underfoot, grinning merrily, everywhere I go.  
  
And the Shinigami division got a raise.  
  
Heero-sama has been complaining about Duo-sama's being underfoot all of the time also. It's... really strange.  
  
Even Trowa-san noticed it. When I asked if he could tell me anything about it, he told me that it was none of his business. Which means that he knows something.  
  
So I asked Quatre-san. He said that Duo had an "exchange of favors" going on with the Shinigami Division. But that was all he knew.  
  
Relena didn't know much either. She just said that he was really easy to find these days. She borrowed books from him.  
  
Really strange.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
(WuFei POV)  
  
My job has kept me pretty busy. I've gotten more letters from Duo /which I still find disturbing/. The Preventers seem to get to the bases of arising problems almost too late each time.  
  
It's frustrating, but at the same time, exciting. There seem to be a lot of unexplained fires on our ship though, especially lately. Po-san has witnessed each one... and I witnessed a good deal more than half of them...  
  
Today though, is calm. Frustratingly so. As I got up to stretch /sitting all day is sooo~ uncomfortable.../, a knock sounded on my door.  
  
As I straightened out my uniform, I called "Come in!" to whoever was behind to door.  
  
I was a bit surprised to see Zechs Marquise enter my office.  
  
"A mission?" I asked, mildly annoyed, for some odd reason. I was about to get ready to go home for the day.  
  
He shook his head. "I just wanted to meet you, outside of battle, and on the same side." He shrugged gracefully. "What happened to your fellow pilots?"  
  
I blinked. "Dead."  
  
An elegant eyebrow lifted, showing that he hadn't known. "How did that happen?"  
  
It was my turn to shrug. "You probably know what happened to Heero. Duo... just..." words failed me. How could I explain that to a stranger? "Died." I finished lamely, shrugging again. "Trowa was shot, protecting Quatre, who died of poisoning a few days later."  
  
"No emotion?" he asked.  
  
"No emotion? There's emotion." I shrugged, once again at a loss of how to explain.  
  
"You sounded... a bit cold, just now, saying that."  
  
"................................" I really couldn't think of anything to say to that. "Get any letters from... Duo, in the past few months?"  
  
He blinked. "Yes, why?"  
  
"Hmm... Well, at least I'm not the only one," I snorted.  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"He's been dead for a good three years."  
  
I felt an intense satisfaction, somehow, in seeing the too-graceful Zechs Marquise fall over in shock.  
  
"What?!?"  
  
"He's been dead for over three years," I repeated, inaccurately.  
  
"Someone else...?"  
  
"No," I sighed, "It's him, alright. His handwriting and everything. He's just got a screwed up sense of humor."  
  
"No kidding..."  
  
I picked up my tea from my desk and toasted, "Too the God of Death and his buddies. May I see them soon." I sipped the tea, after a cautious sniff. I wanted to die in battle, not in my office, drinking tea, like Quatre. That was so undignified of him...  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
-Three years later-  
  
(Duo POV)  
  
"Eh, Watari-kun! Did you have to make so many?"  
  
"Anou... demo... It worked didn't it?"  
  
"Yeah... but their always... well... everywhere... How many did you make?"  
  
"Saaa..." Watari looked away.  
  
"Well?"  
  
He mumbled something.  
  
"Speak up!"  
  
He sighed, pushing his glasses up. "I don't know how many of them there are."  
  
"WHAT!?!?!?" I yelled, "Watari!!"  
  
"-I- only made one. It got free and made the rest. At least they listen to you. Of course, they -have- to, but that's beside the point..."  
  
"I'm gonna have to number them... How can I do that without anybody noticing?"  
  
"Anou..."  
  
"Hmm?  
  
"Your armband."  
  
I grinned. "That'll work. And nobody would notice...! Thanks, Watari... Time to go labeling...! I've got lot's to du-oh!!"  
  
**** Can anybody figure out what Watari did? If you can't, don't worry! You'll find out next chapter!!  
  
Still can't think of anything to put here... Oh, wait, yes I can!!! Suggestions on how to kill off Zechs and WuFei would be appreciated!  
  
Next time: We find out exactly what Watari did, and WuFei finally gets his wish...! Oooo! I wonder what he's gonna be? The others finally take up their positions... And Zechs? What are you doing?!?! 


End file.
